The Sake Bet: A Tale of Two Drunken Seishi

by: Asidian

On a mountain in the land of Konan, two not-so-ordinary young men were out on a walk. It was perfect weather for it: fluffy white clouds hung high overhead and the sun shone brightly. Birds chirped every now and again from the bushes. It was a lovely day to be outside.

Said weather was not, however, what the boy with fiery hair had had in mind when he proposed the outing.

What he did have in mind called for nonchalance, and for careful conversation, and for the monk beside him not to suspect a thing. All of which were areas in which he was currently failing miserably.

Finally, after a particularly long stretch of silence, a high-pitched voice ventured to speak. "Tasuki-kun? Is something bothering you today, no da?"

The young bandit glanced away, folding his arms up behind his head to make an attempt at being casual.

"Iyaa… What would make you say that?"

"…so nothing's on your mind at all, no da?"

The bandit leader seemed to hesitate, his assurance less than enthusiastic. "……Aa.."

The monk came up behind him, voice becoming a bit more serious. "You're sure? You've been acting strangely, Tasuki-kun… Do you want to talk about it?"

Awkwardly, the boy let his hands fall back to his sides. His voice dropped as well, to a soft tone that he hoped mimicked uncertainty. "…its Kouji."

Chichiri moved around to face his friend, the mask's frown becoming his own as he reached up to remove the magical device. "Is something the matter with Kouji-kun, no da?"

Tasuki spent a long moment trying not to stare at the monk's face as he found his voice. "Iya… I just…" There was a blush beginning to creep across his cheeks, and he cursed himself for it, and cursed Chichiri for removing the mask. It certainly wasn't making his task easier.

The older seishi's brow creased in concern, and he set a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder. "Go on…"

The bandit's golden eyes widened just a fraction of an inch at the touch. "I…" He took a deep breath. "Do ya ever wonder whether Kouji talks to himself when no one else is around?" he managed.

Chichiri collapsed to the ground.

"NANI, NO DA?!"

"Ya know how he's always talkin' to himself when there're other people around… so do you think he does it when no one else is there?"

For a long moment the monk stared at him in surprise… and then his features softened into a smile of fond amusement. He rose, pressing the mask back into place, and it turned much the same amused expression to the young bandit.

"I've never thought about it before…" came the considering reply. "…but now that you mention it, I don't suppose he does, no da!"

"You don't? Really?" Tasuki managed a look of disbelief that he was satisfied would fool the monk.

"…you do, no da?"

"Aa. Why wouldn't he? He does it all the rest of the time." The bandit made a brash gesture with one hand, as though dismissing it as common sense.

Chichiri cocked his head, regarding the flame-haired youth curiously. "……Not even Kouji-kun's that weird, no da."

"I'm tellin' ya, I'd bet my tessen he does!"

"Ne, what would I do with your tessen, Tasuki-kun, no da?" the monk laughed.

The younger seishi turned a rakish grin on his companion. "'Kay then…. Ya got somethin' else in mind?"

Chichiri raised his eyebrows, suddenly regarding the sly expression on his friend's face with no small amount of mistrust. "Daaa………."

"Ta bet on," the boy clarified, moving to stand in front of Chichiri. "If yer so sure, then there won't be any problems, na?"

"……" The monk stared at his fellow seishi in suspicion, completely silent for a long moment. But since he was fairly certain it was a bet he couldn't loose… And since not even -Kouji- could be that strange…

"…You have to lay off the sake for one month, Tasuki-kun, no da!"

The fiery-haired bandit blinked twice in rapid succession, taken aback by how easily the monk had set his terms. "Fuck, 'Chiri, I'd almost say you had that one planned!" But since he was fairly certain it was a bet Chichiri couldn't -win-…

"Alright… but ya gotta go drinking with Kouji an' me if I win!"

"-If- you win, no da!" The mask's grin was actually a fairly accurate representation of Chichiri's real expression as he began walking once more.

The bandit stared after his friend for several moments before hurrying to catch up.

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Why, it's the amazingly courageous Kouji, returned home after a successful raid!"

"Oh, Kouji, so glad you're back! Why don't you use the key under the front mat?"

"Thank you!"

The blue-haired bandit flipped the doormat aside with the practice of years and scooped up the key, turning it in the lock and pushing the door open with one swift movement… only to stop dead in his tracks when a strange sight appeared before him.

Tasuki and Chichiri were crouched on the floor near the doorway, still leaning slightly toward the open door. The monk was slumped dejectedly, head bowed, even his bangs a bit wilted. The young bandit, however, was practically glowing with delight: on seeing his friend, he leaped to his feet with a gleeful cry of "Aniki!" and soon they were twirling in a very odd approximation of a greeting dance.

"Gen-chan…?" Kouji managed, after he'd regained his breath from both the surprise and the joy inspired by the Happy Bandit Dance. "What are you two…?"

"We're going drinkin' tonight!" Tasuki proclaimed, apparently so wrapped up in his delight that he didn't hear the young man at all. The fanged grin he wore stretched from ear to ear. "Hell YEAH!!"

"Daaaa…" the monk sighed from his place on the floor, massaging his temple with two fingers. "It's going to be a long night, no daa."

"Yer a damned cheater, ya know that?" Kouji informed the younger boy blandly, keeping pace as they headed down the hall to the monk's room. The young man smirked as he glanced over to his friend and saw the delight that was not-quite-suppressed in his whole manner: barely contained grin (complete with little fangs just visible), wide, shining eyes, whole body charged with excitement.

"I am not," Tasuki shot back. "He agreed."

"But you knew what the answer was before ya made the bet," the dark-haired bandit pointed out.

"So? He shoulda thought of that before he said he'd take it." The boy flashed him a quick, toothy grin.

"…Ano… I don't think he…..."

But whatever he was going to say was lost as they reached Chichiri's room and Tasuki banged impatiently on the door. "Oi! 'Chiri! C'mon, we're late already!"

The door opened momentarily to reveal the monk, sans kesa and shoes, mask frowning in disapproval.

"There's plenty of time for you to get plastered after I finish--" But the fiery-haired bandit had already yanked him into the hallway and was tugging him insistently by the arm.

"Tasuki-kun!" he called vainly, "I have to finish getting dressed, no da!"

By that point, however, they were already halfway down the hall.

Chuckling, Kouji shut the door and followed them.

Chichiri hit the ground laughing. Hard.

The bar loomed up above him, as well as the faces of the two bandits that were staring at him in surprise.

On the bar top, he knew (from personal experience), there sat nine sake bottles, seven and a half of which were empty. The number didn't seem nearly so important as the warmth that flushed his face and burned in his throat, though, nor so important as the expressions on Tasuki and Kouji's faces at the moment.

They were staring at him like he was crazy.

He doubled over with a renewed fit of laughter.

A strong, bare arm hauled him back up to his stool, though, still giggling. And when he'd gathered himself enough to thank his savior, he found himself slurring something vaguely to a grinning, half-clothed red-head.

"Fuck, 'Chiri… If I'd know drinkin' was all it took to get ya to have a little fun, I'd'a done this a -long- time ago!"

Kouji gave a half-drunken cheer. "Lets toast!" he proclaimed loudly, for the seventh time that night. "To Chichiri's havin' fun!" And with that, he promptly downed the contents of his sake cup.

"I'll drink ta that!" the younger bandit cried (though, at this point, there was very little he wouldn't have agreed to) and quickly followed suit.

"Me too, no da!" Chichiri shouted, snatching up his cup and tossing it back… only to find it empty.

The mask frowned deeply at this new turn of events, and he reached for the sake bottle to remedy the situation. His hand-eye coordination at the time was not precisely wonderful, however, and the sake bottle tipped, teetering precariously on one edge. In his rush to set it upright, Chichiri sent it spiraling over the edge of the counter. It fell, still half-full, in a tragic arc toward he hard, unforgiving floor.

…And with a sudden burst of blinding speed, the red-haired seishi averted its fate, catching it in one hand.

"Here ya go," Tasuki grinned and offered it with a fanged, triumphant smirk. "Drink up."

"Arigato, Tasuki-kun, no da!" Mask beaming, Chichiri took the younger seishi's suggestion. Straight from the bottle… And kind of a lot.

Both bandits turned wide eyes to the monk as he crashed to the floor, not-so-giggling this time. In fact, not-so-conscious this time.

For a long moment, they both stared at his unconscious form. Then, finally, Kouji spoke: "Well, shit."

Tasuki remained silent for another moment… and then knelt down by the other seishi's unconscious form.

He hauled the monk up by his arms, grunting softly as he slung the other man over one shoulder. Then he headed for the door.

"Oi, Gen-chan!" Kouji called after him. "Where're ya goin'?"

The red-head turned and favored his friend with a fanged grin. "Ta wake him up." He paused a moment, lingering in the doorway. Then: "Are ya comin', or not?" And he disappeared into the hall, shirtless and more than a little drunk, with Chichiri hanging over one shoulder.

In seconds, Kouji had grabbed the last bottle of sake and taken off after them at a staggering run.

Having lived on Mt. Leikaku for a good many years, Tasuki knew the place well. And, having a fear of water, he'd made it his business to discover the whereabouts of every pond nearby… and avoid each one like the plague. Especially with Kouji around; for some reason the older bandit found it amusing to win fights by dumping his Gen-chan in the deeper water sported by several of the ponds.

Now, however, the red-head picked his way through the brush toward one of said ponds, humming softly (and more than slightly out of tune) to himself. Chichiri, still unconscious, was draped over one shoulder, bangs falling into his masked face. Kouji trailed just after, a half-empty sake bottle in his hand. For the blue-haired bandit, the last half-bottle had finally done the trick: he had gone from somewhat drunk to Absolutely Plastered, and everything had become suddenly very funny.

And so, it was understandable that he collapsed into a helpless, laughing heap on the ground when Tasuki reached the edge of the pond and tossed in the unconscious monk without hesitation or ceremony.

A resounding SPLASH soaked the red-head's pants from the knees down, and pouted momentarily as he regarded the offending water. …But when Chichiri came up, maskless and sputtering, face still flushed from the sake, the bandit was all triumphant grin. "Na, 'Chiri… ready ta go drinkin' again?"

"Ta-Tasuki-kun, no da!" the monk gasped, holding his arms away from his body and staring at the dripping hands with an expression of surprise. "I'm soaking wet, no da!"

"Yeah? So?"

"I… I can't go drinking like this, no da!"

The bandit shrugged, a careless, nonchalant gesture. Sake, apparently, did quite a bit to improve his skills of deceit. "Guess yer gonna have ta come back to my room an' change clothes, then."

Chichiri's face, already stained with a sake-induced blush, grew a shade deeper in its color. "Th-that's alright, Tasuki-kun, no da! I'll dry off soon!"

The red-haired boy just grinned, however, and shook his head. "Iya... Can't have ya all wet the whole night, after all. Ya'd never want ta go out drinkin' again." And with that (and a wink that bordered on suggestive) he took a firm hold on he monk's arm and began hauling him back toward the building they'd left not so very long ago.

"Daaa!" Chichiri cried, distressed, tugging on his arm to free it. "Tasuki-kun! I'm fine-- really, no da!!"

His calls, of course, were promptly ignored by the red-head.

And by Kouji, who had found something vastly more amusing than the sopping monk... and since had ceased to pay attention.

The blue-haired bandit moved cautiously, with the slow, over-exaggerated movements of a drunken man, and leaned toward the edge of the water… He kneeled down oh-so-carefully… Bent over, reaching for something very near the pond's edge…….

And suddenly, Chichiri's protests were interrupted with a very loud, very slurred cry of: "Daaaaaa!"

The two seishi turned to stare.

Kouji, regaining his feet and spinning around with a speed that nearly left him lying in the mud, stood proudly by the pond from which he'd retrieved his new-found treasure. In one of his hands, positioned in front of his face, was Chichiri's mask.

"Look at me, no da!" he crowed. "I'm a monk, no da!"

Miraculously, both Tasuki and Chichiri were sober enough to recognize the oddity of the situation.

"Ano…" the red-head began, dropping his friend's arm to scratch his head uncertainly.

"I've got a cool kesa, no da!" Kouji continued cheerily. The mask beamed.

Sweatdropping, Tasuki smiled a bit, nervously.

"And a staff I carry around everywhere, no da!" The mask seemed completely and utterly pleased with itself.

"Ano… Aniki…" the younger bandit began. "Maybe you had a bit too much to drink, na?"

"And Tasuki-kun set this whole thing up so he could get me in bed with him, no da!!"

Dead silence.

Tasuki stared at Kouji.

Chichiri stared at Kouji.

The mask seemed not the least bit ashamed.

And Tasuki's face matched his hair. Easily.

The wandering seishi turned to his friend, single eye wide, face stained red. "…Na… Nani, no da?!"

The bandit didn't answer, so intent was he upon staring at what had suddenly become a -very- interesting patch of grass.

Chichiri tried again. "Tasuki-kun…?" He tried to search his friend's face, but found that his bangs were doing an effective job of hiding any discernable expression. "Tasuki-kun…" The monk hesitated, then set a comforting hand on the bandit's shoulder. And then, in a voice a touch lower than the one he usually used: "Maybe you're right..."

The boy's eyes shot up to stare incredulously as Chichiri broke into a grin- a real grin, without the mask to force it. "I ought to change, or I'll be soaking wet all night, no da!"

Tasuki's amber eyes grew marginally wider, then, if it were possible. And though his face was still colored with a sake-blush, and the blooming smile there was all joy, there was a suspicious wetness about his eyes that he quickly blinked away, the moment's near-terror quickly forgotten. In an incredibly short amount of time, he had made a full recovery; he flashed a blinding grin that sported his trademark fangs.

"Hai!" the red-haired boy beamed. "Let's go!" Reattaching himself to the monk's arm, he proceeded to drag him back toward the lights in the distance, beyond the trees, as though he'd never stopped at all.

"I can cast cool spells, too, no daa!" came the voice that drifted after them.

In the relative quiet of Tasuki's room, the still-plastered monk leaned for a moment against the bedpost to balance himself. With the mask gone, his sake-flush was more pronounced, and he needed one hand to keep himself steady while the other unfastened his shirt.

Chichiri sighed softly as his fingers attempted an act of coordination far beyond his current ability. "No more bets with Tasuki-kun for me, no da." He told himself quietly, letting his shirt fall open, and then onto the floor with a wet plop. He ignored the part of himself that protested at the thought, the part that supplied him with helpful images of the better times the night had included (more than one of which included Tasuki, sans shirt, throwing a friendly arm around his fellow seishi and telling him to drink up).

The blush that stained the monk's cheeks grew deeper, and he moved hastily to finish changing.

"…Will Tasuki's clothes even fit me, no da?" he wondered aloud to distract himself, unlacing his pants and letting them fall to the floor by the shirt. "And where did he leave them, no da?" His single mahogany eye darted across the chamber, searching for the dry pile of clothes his friend had promised to leave out.

Glad to leave the soaking garments where they lay, he stepped out from the drenched pile of cloth to better search for the clothing… and it was at precisely that moment that the door opened, and Tasuki stepped inside.

Chichiri's entire face flushed red. He stared at the younger seishi that stood in the doorway for a long moment, unable to move. Then, suddenly, the paralysis broke. "H-hentai, no da!! I'm not dressed na no da!!!!" For lack of anything better, the monk snatched a pillow off the bed and used it to cover himself.

Tasuki stared, face as red as the monk's. He seemed to be having problems thinking straight. Having problems thinking, period. "Aa," he managed, one hand reaching vaguely out to pull the door closed and succeeding. "I thought- I didn't---" He was trying desperately not to stare, and failing.

The older man stood waiting expectantly, still blushing brightly.

"I mean, I…" The bandit took a quick breath. "I thought ya might have trouble findin' the clothes I set out, so I was gonna show you where they were. I didn't think ya were already changin'." He trained amber eyes on the floor, his own face flushed.

"…Well?" Chichiri stood with the pillow firmly in both hands, watching his friend intently.

"Huh? Well what?" The bandit jumped a bit, turning guilty eyes toward the monk.. "Where are the clothes, no da?"

"Oh! Yeah! Right!" Tasuki flashed the monk a self-conscious little grin and started toward him.

The blue-haired seishi jumped a bit, waved one hand wildly as though to ward him away. "Aaah! I have no clothes on, Tasuki-kun! Have some decency, no da!"

The flame-haired seishi scowled, apparently offended by the accusation. "Suzaku! I'm no hentai, 'Chiri! The clothes are right there!" And with this he gestured vaguely to the area behind the flustered seishi.

"O-oh…" The word came out weak even in Chichiri's ears, and the monk fervently hoped that the disappointment wasn't too obvious in his tone. Then promptly kicked himself for being disappointed to begin with.

The bandit crossed the room swiftly, forcing himself not to let his eyes stray to Chichiri's mostly-naked form. It was, quite frankly, the most difficult thing he'd ever done.

He made it without looking (though just barely) and retrieved his clothes from the spot where they waited, which was, coincidentally, not at all where Tasuki had promised to leave them. Or in view at all.

"Here ya're," he told his friend cheerily. Making himself smile despite the feelings that raged inside him, he turned to face the monk and offer the armful of clothing… and froze. And stared.

The sight of a single mahogany eye watching him, the absence of the mask, the water that still bedraggled the monk's bangs… Somehow, it brought reality finally crashing down on the boy.

Chichiri was in his room. Drunk. Naked. The mask, blessedly, was gone. For once, he could see the other man's face-his true face-and the flush of sake and embarrassment still tinged his cheeks. It was too much.

With a soft little moan, Tasuki closed the distance between their lips, putting everything he'd ever been too afraid to say into one passionate kiss. The dry clothes fell forgotten to the floor as the red-haired bandit pulled his friend close, wrapping possessive arms around him, expressive face finally showing the true extent of his feelings. Letting his eyes drift closed, he prayed to Suzaku for the moment never to end.

It did.

Kind of soon.

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Why, it's Genrou's buddy, Kouji!"

"Oh, Kouji, I'd -love- to have you join me and my friend!"

"Oh, thank you, I'd be glad!"

……And then the door opened again.

"Daaaa!" Kouji exclaimed from the doorway, waving cheerily, much to the horror of the two seishi. The young man was now actually wearing the mask, and it served only to heighten his grin and enhance the drunken flush. Also, he seemed to have gotten a hold of another bottle of sake.

Chichiri eeped and hid behind the bandit, flush growing to immense proportions as he realized that he was still very much naked.

"Ooohh," Kouji giggled, oblivious to Chichiri's discomfort as he pointed at the pair (and Tasuki, even in his drunken state, reflected that he never thought he'd live to see Kouji giggle). "It worked, no da! Way to go, Tasuki-kun, no da!" And, flashing his friend the victory sign, Kouji turned to leave the room at a staggered run.

"Hey guys!" they heard him call as the door slammed after him. "They're makin' out!- Genrou and Chiiiiri, sittin' in a tree………"

And as his voice drifted away, silence descended onto the room like a plague. Fighting against a thousand feelings, both seishi wished fervently for the other to speak first-and so, after a long, awkward stretch of absolute stillness, they both began at once.

"Gomen nasai, I didn't mean to--"

"Tasuki-kun, what were you--"

And they stopped, and they stared. And blushed, looking away guiltily.

Another heavy silence fell upon them, its weight crushing.

And then, uneasily, the monk spoke: "I… I should go, Tasuki-kun, no da. I think I… should go." The confusion of the situation clearly wasn't helping his sake-fogged mind.

"Go?" The anguish in the red-head's stare could have broken the hardest of hearts. Chichiri, unfortunately, was too busy snatching up one of the fallen articles of clothing to notice.

"H-hai. Thank you for taking me drinking, no da. A-and…" He faltered, not knowing what to say. Not even knowing where to begin. And certainly not prepared to deal with any of it drunk.

"Go?" Tasuki repeated numbly, fingers reaching up to touch lips that were still warm from the Chichiri's own.

The monk replied hurriedly, barely sparing the other seishi a glance. "H-hai! Goodnight!" The monk bobbed his head once, quickly, and wrapping the shirt around his waist, made a rush for the door.

It banged open loudly, with the force of Chichiri's desperation, revealing blessed escape.

And… bandits. Lots of bandits. Drunken, leering bandits. With Kouji among them.

"Oh, don't mind us, no da!" he reassured the terrified monk. "We're just listening to hear if you an' Gen-chan do anything interesting."

Chichiri slammed the door closed and leaned against it, single eye huge. "Daaa…" he whimpered.

To his surprise, however, he found a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "They're not so bad," the red-haired seishi assured him. "Don't worry about 'em."

"Demo… demo, they're blocking the hall, no da! I can't -leave-, na no da!" Being in close proximity with the red-head (and the collective lack of clothing between the two) seemed to be having adverse effects on Chichiri's logic.

Logical or no, though, the protest left the monk with his friend's intense amber eyes locked onto his own… and the pain in his gaze was unmistakable. When Tasuki spoke, his voice was low and more than a little hurt. "…I don't see why ya have ta run off so quick, anyway."

It might have been the boy's voice, so serious, or maybe his eyes, their usual vibrant gold tinged with hurt… But something about the sight tugged at Chichiri's heart.

The monk froze, finding himself unable to breathe for the long moment that followed, for the moment that laid the red-head's soul out at his feet. ...And, truth be told, there was something hopeful in his manner as he stared at his friend, single eye wide. Suddenly, a peculiar lump had formed in his throat, making his voice tight and his eye prickle around the edge.

"A… ano…" he managed around it, with a shaky little smile. "I guess… I guess I don't, either."

And he tilted his head up to place a soft little kiss on Tasuki's lips.

For a long, long moment, the other seishi didn't say anything; he simply searched his friend's face, hoping beyond hopes that he'd find there what he'd longed for.

And then the boy broke into a slow, amazed smile, one that rapidly faded into a full-out grin.

"Well…" he offered with a wink, "If yer not goin' back to yer room, I guess ya can always sleep in my bed… na?"

Chichiri blushed a bright red all over again, laughing a nervous little laugh as he moved a touch closer to his love. And since he -wasn't- planning on going back to his room… "H-hai… I guess I can, no da."

And he did.

And the bandits outside were mightily entertained. ^_~

~owari~

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